Thursday, April 02, 2009

things the rally monkey says

Disquisition on the Cookie Monkster

RM: You say that you're like the Cookie Monster, but you have to understand what the Cookie Monster really is. He doesn't just eat delicious chocolate chip cookies. He eats any type of cookies, and all the cookies present. And there are some pretty crappy cookies in the world. You on the other hand are kind of picky about what you like. The Cookie Monster has no discretion whatsoever. If he were a drug addict, he'd be the kind of drug addict that would stick himself with someone else's used needle. He doesn't care about anything but cookies. He'd eat cookies out of the trash.

[for those who thought it impossible to treat any subject too seriously]

20 comments:

Jolie said...

Last night my girlfriend and I were discussing the merits of one day getting a cat that we would name Potato. This is what happens when you've been with somebody long enough. You have to get pretty creative with your disquisition subject matter, because the rest has all been talked to death.

moonrat said...

the RM could talk death itself to death. ::weep::

Alps said...

Doesn't Cookie Monster eat more than just cookies? I've seen him eat all kinds of stuff. He's more than a needle-sharing drug addict; he's got a coffee habit, doughnut fascination, and a fetish for designer shoes. Better set Rally Monkey straight!

Bradley Robb said...

I must have drinks with the Rally Monkey. I wonder what he's like half a dozen in.

Anissa said...

I pretty much am like the Cookie Monster. Minus the crack.

Jacqui said...

Alps is right. My son and I had a talk this morning about how Cookie Monster eats boxes, dishes, and pieces of the wall.

moonrat said...

Jacqui--how old is your son? It's VERY interesting to me that he and the RM have similar interests.

Tara Maya said...

Oh goodness did you see the Cookie Monster take on the Madoff Scandal?

http://midnightmeditations.blogspot.com/2009/04/april-fools-day-lol.html

WARNING: Muppet with a gun. Very, very wrong.

Sooki Scott said...

Ah, come on, the little guy can’t help himself.

=========================

Reports say;

The spotlight on the goings-on has brought to light the true nature of Cookie's cravings: a genetic vitamin deficiency. Cookie lacks the genes to make Vitamin CK and must eat cookies to supplement his diminished natural supply. Symptoms of CK deficiency include manic activity, loss of verbal proficiency (evidenced by confused grammar) and blue hair. Sufferers of this debilitating disease are known to react irrationally violent when presented with the object of their affliction.

======================

Confucius says, woman who put dish soap on top shelf, jump for Joy.

Rick Daley said...

Yesterday I learned that my 4 year old can travel in time, and I'm going to exploit him to win the lottery and buy a lifetime supply of Girl Scout cookies. Seriously. More details available at:

http://mydaleyrant.blogspot.com

Stop by and comment and maybe I'll give you a sleeve of Thin Mints.

WORD VERIFICATION: flavin. Not sure what it means, exactly, but I'm pretty sure it has to do with savoring delicious cookies.

JES said...

To be fair to the Rally Monkey, I think you should conduct a little thought exercise. Imagine he runs into Cookie Monster in some social setting -- a bar or party, say. He ends up describing you to CM, who then tries to impress him by insisting he, Cookie Monster, is like you in various ways.

RM replies: You say that you're like the MoonRat, but you have to understand what the MoonRat really is. She doesn't just...

And you take it from there.

Doesn't this paint a much less obsessive and/or more sensitive picture of RM?

Clearly, mocking RM for his devotion to his personal heroes is failing to take him seriously enough.

moonrat said...

oh man. what's with all these rally monkey apologists?!

JES said...

Now now. We're not playing favorites, not taking sides. If we knew where his blog was we'd be leaping to apologize for, er, to explain you, too.

Jacqui said...

My son is 2 1/2, but his sister is a CM-loving 6 year old, so he's advanced in the Cookie Monster arts.

I do find it fascinating we had very similar conversations this morning, though I fear my son was just trying to justify his own consumption of non-food products.

Jo said...

He only eats other things if he thinks they are cookies. They have to be shaped liked cookies. I don't think his mouth is actually attached to a stomach of any kind which is an important differentiation. No gullet, no foul, as they say.

Miriam S.Forster said...

Harharhar... At least he talks. Dan and my dad spent most of last week pretending to shoot each other with their iphone gun applications. :-)

(My husband is a wonderful and verbal person, but the iphone turned him into a five-year-old. And don't even get me started on the fart app...)

Diane T said...

So the Cookie Monster has a lack of discretion when it comes to the consumption of cookies (and nonfood objects attached to cookies). I still think he has a very healthy attitude towards life, as articulated on my favorite coffee mug:

Work hard. Play fair. Eat Cookie!

Not bad words to live by.

Briony said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYiFxGtseHw

I think there is a little cookie monster in all of us :)

moonrat said...

briony, we watched the whole video together.

RM is very nostalgic about sesame street. now he's singing the "breakfast song":

i want a soft-boiled cookie
with some cookie juice on the side

PurpleClover said...

Hmm...I'm craving cookies now.

Thanks. A lot.