1) watched or returned any Netflix
2) sat through an episode of something on TV
3) cleaned my office
4) cleaned my house
5) gone grocery shopping
6) done laundry
7) updated my poor book log
8) gone to the gym
9) felt not tired
10) felt excited enough about a new submission to bring it to ed meeting (hard to feel excited when you don't have time to read)
11) returned any emails to all the poor people who've written to me, loyal friends who will soon be lost!
12) cooked something on the stove (or, for that matter, in the microwave)
Woe.
Do you know what I think would fix all of this? An office puppy. This dog will do.

38 comments:
i hear ya. life as a drained and exhausted shell of a person gets boring really fast. if i feel like 'butter scraped over too much bread' for too long i usually crash and get sick. as much as the ensuing illness sucks, there's a part of me that absolutely relishes being in bed all day.
- josh
p.s. would you recommend pursuing a career as an editor? sometimes it's hard to tell if you're having a good time. only sometimes, though.
- josh
That is one of the most adorable puppies I've ever seen.
If everything written here is completely true, either you work insanely hard or you have an aversion to cleaning, TV, exercise, e-mail and homecooked meals. Ha ha.
Joshua--I love being an editor; the perks waaaay outweigh everything else.
The stress is often pretty bad; usually about three times a year, since most companies have three catalogs that need to be prepared for, so things tend to happen in clumps of threes. Right now, not only is it one of those times, we (in publishing in general) are doing the usual tasks with dramatically decreased people power.
That said, as tired as I am, I still wake up in the morning excited to go to work. Some people think I'm sick.
Our IT person brings in a portuguese water dog - a puppy - everyday and it's all I can do not to steal it. I suspect it's management's test: will they continue to be productive with this distraction present? I'm sure I've failed.
cool. i don't think there are a whole lot of people left in the world who exhaust themselves for a job that they love.
props to you.
- josh
Brian--Portuguese water dog?!?! ::gurgle::
Joshua--I'm really lucky. I know that. Someone's paying me (albeit not a whole lot) to do what I'd be doing all day if I didn't have to work. I *am* aware that I got it good.
I'm relieved showering wasn't on your list.
Lol. So, you're half asleep, unbathed, wearing questionably clean clothing, spend an inordinate amount of money eating out or ordering in, are out of shape, live and work in a trash heap, work insane hours, AND you're not getting any decent material in your inbox?
F'ing writers.
What a cutie-patootie! Hubster has been trying to convince the boss that bringing our Old English Sheepdog to work would improve moral.
--no luck, yet.
12. Had (or posted about) an indie rock moment.
But who's counting? :)
I wish i had some witty comment but alas my brain is fried at the moment.
you said earlier though in an earlier post that you were worried about alzheimers - theres this recent thing thats emerged called
'survivor stress syndrome' which is the stress people feel post-downsizing.
http://humanresources.about.com/od/layoffsdownsizing/a/survivors_cope.htm
which i thought you might find interesting, if not interesting, its well you know depressing.
Who knows, maybe you could get doctors note ;)
P.S. That puppy is sooo cute!!! I wish i had one to help me battle the woes of study!
P.P.S. thought id let you know that one of 'the mischiefs' is debuting in July 2009 with their first novel
Cut Short by Leigh Russell.
http://www.noexit.co.uk/titles.php/itemcode/488
I think that puppy is a great idea. And my house is a disaster too, if it makes you feel any better...
So what are you eating? Just cold food? Yogurt? Cottage cheese? Cornflakes dry out of the box?
An office puppy? What a brilliant idea!
I'm with you on having no time. I took today off (without pay) because I'm just that desparate for a break. And the day has zipped by way too fast.
I know what puppy you want, and quite possibly his owner: Barry Eisler, here: http://www.new.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1199097956&ref=profile#/photo.php?pid=577920&id=561186047
Yes!
An office puppy solves all problems. You never have to clean the floor because they'll eat anything that drops there. They make you get off your expanding gym-missing rear once in a while to let them outside. They'll always do their best to get you excited about what they're excited about. Sure a dead squirrel's not a manuscript but hey, it's something. And they think you're drop dead gorgeous even in faded sweats and humpback whale-sized bags under your eyes.
I'd absolutely curl up and die without my 10 year old office puppy.
My verification word is uritabl.
The state of having an annoyed bladder? Hmmm.
Seriously. You can't continue like that or the crash and burn won't be pretty. Time to have a heart to heart with the higher-ups.
Puppies can cure the worst of ailments.
I can understand the laundry, the office cleaning, the house cleaning but NO groceries for a month?
We all need our chocolate ;)
I'd think that cure lil puppy would be a greater distraction to getting things done. But I guess you wouldn't care very much.
Me too. Tired that is.
I haven't done the tidy bowl thing in a long time. My kids are wondering if koi are populating our bathrooms yet. Dinner? Thank goddess for Wendy's. Hang tight. Peace...
AWWWWW! Is he really yours?
:-)
I've been in an editing parallel universe too, but I did have time to dip into "The Subversive Copy Editor" by Carol Fisher Saller (the woman who answers the questions on Chicago Manual's Q&A website...). It's sweet and charming and wise -- and this passage made me feel a little bit better:
"If you are reading this book, it is possible that you are just such a stressed-out copy editor. You are an intelligent, sensitive, conscientious soul ready to buckle under the strain of too much work to finish perfectly in too little time. You stay up nights to meet deadlines; you work through weekends. You cry. And that is very wrong; there should be no crying in copyediting."
Don't worry about the house-cleaning: Quentin Crisp said that after four non-cleaning years, the dirt doesn't get any worse. If you leave it long enough, you'll hit the plateau...
Yipes! That puppy is so cute it could be used in an unscrupulous advertising campaign to make us buy/say/do anything.
Hopefully, it'll just get stroked and stroked till it's bald and everything in a two mile radius is covered in dog hair.
Or not.
Meanwhile — that's some list. If it's any consolation, I've been scrimping on shaving for the past couple of weeks, so I hope that offers you some solace in your quest for things you can't not have done.
The one consolation is that it will all soon be over, so start stocking that Over Indulgence Shelf right away. Wine, nachos, chocolates, fluffy Gaiman motif slippers — all visible, all waiting...
Let's be reasonable here.. ... You do not do #3, 4, 5, 6, 8 or 12 in your normal life either.
Ne?
Jo--I eat a piece of toast with peanut butter and strawberry jam for breakfast, a piece of toast with cream cheese for lunch, and Chinese take-out from Hong Garden for dinner, unless I eat out of a pint of Haagen Daz with a spoon.
Jalexis... I concede your point.
Chris--alas for misrepresentation... I found that dog on the internet under the search terms "dachshund puppy." But if you find this dog in real life please steal it for me.
WrittenWyrdd--how you tease us!! That link doesnt work. SHOW US THE CUTEST PUPPY IN THE WORLD!!
I'm just glad to hear editorial meetings are still happening! I want that puppy!
Office puppy!
Eat your fruits and veggies. Don't want to get scurvy! I'm reminded of the Jolt Cola/Doritos diet of my youth...
That puppy looks exactly like the dog I had when I was eight. He wasn't a Dachsund, though -- he was a German Shepherd/Black Lab mix, and incredibly cute.
I hope you at least get to catch up on sleep and eat real food soon!
A month of no Netflix? Here's my Netflix info:
1.Prime Suspect 4: Disc 1
shipped 07/11/08
2. 3:10 to Yuma
shipped 04/29/08
I haven't watched Netflix in almost a year. In fact, I think I'll bundle these up & send them back today. Yay! I've accomplished something!
umm, eden? you win re: netflix.
PLEASE tell me you actually got that puppy!
Oh, poor sweetheart! I wish I could help.
I can't decide which of us has it worse: you, loving your job but having NO free time; or me, with a decent amount of leisure/social time but feeling dead inside all day at my job.
... yeah, I'd rather have your life, I think.
And I would not recommend an office puppy! Dogs require time and attention and energy that you clearly don't have right now. Office kitty would be much less time consuming, but just as cute!
Your brain was blended
then you found you'd ascended.
Nice, how it ended.
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